The Homoworld

Us 3...Siblings

2011-05-26T00:41:00.001+01:00

I called her and then I went on and on about my life, I thought that's what mums were all about. I am not sure about this. You heard the latest about Nora? Well let me tell you almost everything about her latest thoughts... then realised I shouldn't have.

Mum: "What a fucking night you three (us 3 siblings) are giving me!"
Me: why?
Mum: your BROTHER just called me (then hung up on me) to announce he bought a dog!
Me: really, is that the end of the world?!

You guys don't know her, but us siblings call her the OCD cleaning lady. It was only last year that I realised that she was actually pretty badly OCD-ed. In Spanish words; puta maniaca.

I won't see your nephew and niece if they have a dog. Why? Cos my hoover still stinks from the last husky shitting dog which I loved dearly. I was surprise to hear the following:

Me: so... Kids... Yeah...bloody burden they are...
Mum: no, just three of you
Me: so... We shouldn't get any
Mum: well maybe not genetically
Me: good, we are thinking of adopting

-END-

H -I-M in capital letters

2011-02-15T21:41:00.001Z

I know forgive me, champagne glasses after and a long pee, I couldn't leave the Movie in such a small room. "Paul" can be seen in DVD or even "legally" downloaded at home, I wouldn't watch it again.

So today was the very first time I listened to "Born This Way", from queen lady gaga. I do like it, specially: "don't be a drag, just be a queen". Orient and Chloe, never knew that was racist. I'm sure she didn't please some of those fags, I wonder whether she could say 'Faggot' and be ok in the general press. I'm not crazy about her, but I do admire her strength and the faking guts to be political.

"This is a Gay free zone" the stickers say around Hackney Road. Apparently up by Muslim radicals although the police don't discard the possibility of the English Defence League stirring racial tension in a crowded ethnic minority community such as tower hamlets and hackney. Will have to see if these are still up so the council removes them. In a way I want them up so the rest of those people that tell me that we have it very easy now and that shouldn't worry about holding hands, look at them realise that it's still not fine. Stop playing the victim, fairy enough, but I have been shouted homophobic abuse in London several times, and once on our way to the tube on our wedding day.

Romantic. I give a shit.

This one taken in Vauxhall of a moderfakingoodcooking Gogo in Fire.

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Siblings

2011-02-04T19:38:00.001Z

That's what I have been told few times, and some of you know what I am talking about. I don't mean being rude or bossy, it just happens, out of magic, anyway i don't dwell too much on this.
Feeling ok about yourself is probably something that is built in.

I was called names so many names at schools, but it just went through my head. It never really bothered me enough to consider "what the fuck I am". I lived in a pretty relax family and I owe everything to my parents for having arguments close doors, out of my sight. I appreciate that.

I was such a sensitive boy growing up, and somehow being gay never bothered me. Really? Did all gays cry to the death on their own rooms alone? I believe that:" It Gets Better Campaign" spells it out.

We are now looking whats happening with our jobs, and thus our financial situation. We want to adopt. I day dream. I night dream about it. I am being called Aita (dad in basque) and Adam is daddy, we all four go on a day out. Brother and sister that's what we would like, siblings.

*Sigh*

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Location:Inside the tube

Fagged Out by Butt Magazine

2011-01-26T21:57:00.003Z

Being a fag can sometimes be so much easier. Forget the gay bashing, the abuse, the stigma attached to the word faggot, and the awful moment of coming out. I hate that word. There has to be many moments in life when we go out there and practice it and then realize that we do have it easy. I read this post from The BUTT magazine site, a lovely normal story of some Londoners. Read below.

“When the Joiners Arms shut its doors at 4 a.m. I invited all the boys back to my house. There were ten of us hanging out during that night but only six of them fancied the after party; perhaps my suggestion of some naughty fun may have discouraged the others. I was staying for two months at my friend’s Steven’s flat in a very dodgy council estate in Whitechapel. Once we got there the only guy I didn’t really fancy passed out in somebody’s room, so I thanked the Lord and was the first to drop to my underwear. But I was so drunk that I just spooned Vincent and we slept so deeply that I heard nothing from the other three who were fucking in the same bed next to us. Vincent was a hot French-Canadian boy who was backpacking in Europe. We met through couchsurfing.com. He had a super fit body, tanned skin, light blue eyes, and a naïve but very beautiful smile. I quite enjoyed falling asleep since Vincent was a lovely guy to snuggle with. Besides, one of the three was my best friend, so it would have been really odd having sex with him, or even seeing him having sex. When I woke up the next morning, desperate for water and a pee, I noticed how lovely this scene was – all five of us together in one bed, so I just had to take a picture with my phone. Of course nobody could sleep well squeezed together, with Vincent snoring like a pig. My best friend eventually took off with Louis leaving me to enjoy a nice threesome afterwards.”

Message on the pavement

2011-01-26T09:51:00.003Z

I don't tend to see graffiti on the floor but this one caught my eye yesterday when I was walking to the office. Are people that promiscuous or is it a love message Hackney-way, East London?

I think is a love message, how romantic.

- From my iPhone (Not yours, mine)

Location:Hackney

Self centred nude portraits

2011-01-23T20:16:00.006Z

Obsessed with photos, or with yourself. Either or, it doesn't matter, that's what we are doing more and more with the gadgets that we have now. There has been an impressive number of people being comfortable with having their photos taken. I have always been easy with this, but some people that I knew really detested the idea of being semi nude or nude in front of the camera, now is all changing. It must be that we are getting older and at ease with this thought. No. There is a camera everywhere we go, we record more than ever before, and whether we use our self portrait photos for our own self-fulfillment or 'commercial' purposes, the thing is that there are million of digital stills our ourselves.

Imagine if this movement would have come 30 years ago, we would have plenty of photos of our parents', the baby-boomers, sexual encounters in display. Will this change? will this get worse? or will the moral reverse and become less self-center and hypocrite? In my opinion it will be more mainstream, and it will be seen as normal, but it wont be in the same format that we have it now. It may turn into video instead.

Steve Rosenthal collected tiny sex-nude photos from gay users in Gaydar back in 2009. For a longer article read the interview with Steve

Faking everyone else

2010-11-09T20:16:00.001Z

Yes, f-k you. Come on, we all know the Tories were going to fire us, why do we all sound so freaking surprised.

I went all day feeling smug, yes, oh, I haven't had any of those chocolate heroes in 2 days, and! I'm going to the gym, wow so freaking smug.

Council. Team meeting. Blablabla. Are we safe? Can I still have my spotify account? ... Well we are in much better position than faking Baby P council shitpants someone said.

Is that meant to make me feel
safer? I forgot, I don't work there, but half of our household income does. Incapable to keep kids out of murderers, why will they be able to keep other non-essential carbon reduction jobs safe?! I am spoilt, I was. Fair enough, but I worked pretty hard to be where I am. I didn't just use my gay charm and magic funny eye. I used my parents money instead and secured a uni place. Then, 7 hours and 17 minutes later I met Adam. He was 18, I was 18 years and 10 months, not a pedo after all. I met him, he met him, and decided I wanted him. 10 years later we got married, the Labour party allowed us, we felt less leprosy. Now the Tories and parasite Lib Dems, have ruined my weekend.

Oh yeah, I hope Nick, Mr Clegg, que tu mujer te la este chupando mucho ahora que eres "casi prime minister". Fak ya.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone, written inside the tube, where they can at least fak everyone else trying to have a
Job.", idiotic strikers. Yes, fak you all too.

Jon, "A Not So Single Man"

2010-09-02T08:24:00.001+01:00

After few drinks we braved to point at him with our finger.

-Is that him? I asked Adam
-yes you knob stop pointing so embarrassing! Said the shy drunken Adam.
-I go! I go! I will touch him, ok fine I will speak to him. Nora slurred while she "tried" walking towards Jon Kortajarena.

It was a Wednesday during the Aste Nagusia of Bilbao, Basque Country. The popular drinking marquees were striking so they were closed, but the "pijo" (snob) marquees, as the left wing voters refer to the more spaniard sounding music marquee, were opened.

Me and Adam looked from the distance how Nora was talking to the wrong Jon. The guy seemed confused and Nora kept talking to him, while Jon looked amused about their conversation.

She comes back in a very not straight line with a very short dress that is not usually worn in conservative Bilbao town;

-is not him! He's some French model, £&@&&**%*!!! You twats!
-£&&£*%#!!!! of course, Jon was the one next to that guy!

Anyway, if we would have drunk less perhaps I could have felt his lips, but most likely in my dreams.

A Single Man. Tom Ford. He is the Spanish James Dean lookalike in the car park, I remember the lips close up scene. Not wonder he is Tom's favourite muse.

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Gustavo Querido come to me

2010-07-16T00:21:00.001+01:00

I spent a nice afternoon watching at paint, no quite dry, but I never seen it from that quiet perspective at The National Portrait Gallery. It was a bit geeky, I read about the paintings in wikipedia, and I typed, "are the artist gay?", funny enough some of them came out online after 200-300 years in the closet.

I like Gustavos painting of The Man in The Bath, he was drying himself. It caught my eye because it caught my eye right now, so I was imagining the audience captured in the 19th century, a man observing at his own scrotum in front of a painting.

Gustavo decided to paint just that. I still like it, and I still think there some gayness there.

I don't have the right pict here, but I think this is the sequence, or part 2 of painting 1 I am referring to.

Dear Sophie E.B.

2010-07-12T20:15:00.000+01:00

Thanks for the message. 'Murder in The Dancefloor' is how we will remember how we started. One wintery day in the year 2000, this song came out few times in MTV, the dancer apparently had a grin that made Adam think of me. Every time that song came out Adam will smile and I... Well I would say, 'he is cuter than me!'.

Now 10 years later we proudly framed your message.

Adam, I just want to keep dancing one more.

Police me

2010-06-28T11:38:00.001+01:00

Today Monday I answered the door as soon as Adam left the house to a blond kid with blue eyes and a black topman top. He knocked the door very loudly, I was still in my pants and I was going to quickly put some shorts on but he knocked so loudly that I answered seminaked:

Yes?!, I said
He nervously replied: ermm.. Do you need to make a council tax payment?
What? No!

He left. But at the same time I also noticed the white van disappeared. Last week we had an attempted burglary. The door frame had been damaged. The week before some fucking Irish cunt knocked the door while Adam was at home, banging very loudly again. Again the conversation was ridiculous. Thieves with a low IQ that unfortunately may be successful in getting in.

Adam staying in, buying alarm system and we installing a CCTV camera right at the front and back. Fucking cunts.

Fair enough I had an easy life but I also left my country when I was a kid and I didn't speak that great English.

In 2 years I have opened more criminal police references that my entire village put together in the last 10 years. I feel like having a direct phoneline: 3 attempted burglaries, 1 mugging, 2 physical assaults and 3 verbal homophobic threats, one of this on my wedding day.

Free speech I guess.

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Crowdness

2010-06-25T09:33:00.001+01:00

I realised the meaning of this one a while after I uploaded it. It's a picture I would hang on the wall.

You can tell the hot weather has arrived... I was listening to Kylie's new song, the one with a mountain of selftouching half naked crowdness. It makes me smile and day dream I'm not in Hackney or even in London, I am in that isolated beach with Adam 'n... Admiring the birds you woud say".

PS: I am finding it hard to be myself here anymore, ok I wasn't 100% before but I was more honest.

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Content-IOUS

2010-06-12T19:14:00.001+01:00

Selected few Polaroid photos taken with iPhone from last weeks.

The bamboo at home. I love how the sun stays until very late in the garden. It's nice coming from the office and having a relax time seeing the sunset, perhaps with a Bacardi or Pimms. Playing XX and day dreaming about leaving this country. I'm happy here but there is too much out there to see and with this new recession coming, well it's keeping me a bit on the edge. We will be debt free this summer but sacrificing my beach time.

I won't let you go, you better stay out this new decade 2010.

I need it as much as possible, either way I better start cycling to work to lose this stupid belly.

Off to Gabbys BBQ now, I promise not to stick the chicken bones in her garden this time AND as long as I don't eat a raw pumpkin I should be diarrhoea free tomorrow morning.

She is here

2010-06-02T22:24:00.001+01:00

But it is not the same. I remember when my parents took us to the beach, when I couldn't wait to take my clothes off to swim, that would be the first thing I would do, ran ran ran and drawn. I almost did, but that was the joy of it, I learnt to respect those smalls killer waves that engulfed me in their swirly currents full of sand. My pants were. They were full of sand.

Since I came to this island it's completly alien to me now. Though the second I am out there with Lorenzo and water, I am a changed man. Relax. I can't find that moment in London. Not ever. There are very weird times where I feel very content; when I am hungover. I am realizing I am using "I" a lot, I certainly don't want to talk about you here.

I I I I I miss the sun and her beaches with it's bitches :(

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Erratic Weather

2010-05-26T09:43:00.000+01:00

That's what a teenager said when walking with his friends and their hoodies on yesterday when Adam and I walked to the tube to get to Hamspted Heath.

We spent the hottest day so far with the rest of the homos, drinking, chatting and laughing at each other. Matthew convinced me to go to then pond with my Manly Speedos. Felt refreshing, shame the rest of the city decided to do the same. The pict below captures the day;

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Gibson Gardens,Hackney,United Kingdom

Sister jumping on her 35th birthday

2010-04-28T21:23:00.001+01:00

Plain Different

2010-04-20T14:06:00.004+01:00

I was walking down Dalston Lane before Easter, and I noticed loads of thick plane trails. I took my iphone out, and then saturated the colours to make the trails stand out more. Today, 20th of April, I did the same but I obtained a different perspective: Complete Clear Skies.

This helps

2010-03-21T23:37:00.000Z

Nice memories that make me have a grin

there are so many more

Cookie Factory- The 1920s

2010-01-21T14:29:00.006Z

Almost 100 years ago my gran, dads mum, worked in a cookie factory in Begoña neighbourhood in Bilbao. She worked with her sisters and friends. I found this photo the othe day and made me laugh. We don't get silly photos from those days, the 1920s, now we just take them away and facebook and everyone else doesn't care as they are all the same, photos from above and pouting.

Valentina, that was her name, she died in February 2002, a heart thing, too much laughter. Last memory I have got from her is of New Years Eve dinner at home, demanding champagne top up even though she was on a list of medications. She grabbed my dads arm and made him fill her glass. A month later she collapsed and my friend from Abadiño picked her up, she died then.
Anyway, here the photo of these art deco ladies having a photo shoot fight

Technorati Tags: valentina 1920s ander80 homoworld bilbao

Done 2009

2009-12-31T20:21:00.000Z

If I hated it 2008, I loved 2009. I remembered kissing Adam in the NYE party for 2009, and crying saying this year will be amazing, well it has to be better. it was.

I never thought. So yes, I had an unforgettable trip in Hong Kong, Sydney, Cape Tribulation and Melbourne in March. I went back to my dearest nudist beach in June, We had our stag night in Barcelona and Adam n me got married on the 26th of September. The day was more than I could imagine. We went to Maldives in October and became 29 on a full moon night on a deserted beach. I came to work to won awards, the most gratifying the Hackney Star.

Now here in the tube smiling for next years NYE party for 2010.

It can't get any better and for that I am happy.

Look out for us during the 2000 tennies!!!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Wayland Ave,Hackney,United Kingdom

Navidad & Gabonak & Xmas

2009-12-11T09:57:00.001Z

It's vulgar, its tacky and it's for kids. But I like getting together, although this year I will be staying in London with new Husband and Fabien, Sister Nora will arrive from Thailand on Nativity day for dessert and loads of bubbles. In fact I can't wait, I take it back, Xmas is for adults, kids can have disposable toys.

What a better place to buy crap than going to a mall, where we are just one of those reflected.

Only bitter cos we don't have cash, as we still paying for the wedding.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Wayland Ave,Hackney,United Kingdom

Self Portrait

2009-12-01T20:50:00.001Z

1 year old photo

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Dont think bout it

2009-12-01T20:49:00.001Z

Lie down please!

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East London

2009-11-28T18:15:00.002Z

Simply coffee time in Hackney, has a lot to offer this east borough.

And today saturday compost meeting in Hoxton, gotta love the place. Sky, glass and street art, plus pissy drunken corners at nights. Just like marmite, but I do like it.

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Come back

2009-11-17T09:27:00.001Z

...dont go. I miss you.

This sun was taken in the middle of Melbourne, by the river. I work in the ground floor, but it might as well be the basement, as we have the train tracks slope to look out and admire through our jail like windows. Now that is getting into body hibernation mode, I hardly see the sunlight.

I am trying to focus myself on work so that I don't get Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D.). It working, I am not depressed yet. Although it's only been 1 month.

-- Posted from my iPhone

Hackney Star

2009-11-06T10:14:00.001Z

My work friends are going to get sick of my celebrations, they will cos I know I will be admiring the glass star I won yesterday from my desk, you talking to a Hackney Star. Internal awards for the council to highlight those that go beyond their workload *giggles*.

The red carpet ceremony took place last night in Shoreditch Town Hall.

I owe my team drinks as I promised them I would if I won, I was so convinced I wasn't going to.

Thanks to the boss Gilbert, who submitted a winning nomination.

Note: The nomination is available by request. I would look as narcissistic as Nietzsche if I posted it here.

-- Posted from my iPhone

Big Gay Wed that I didnt expect

2009-11-01T23:53:00.022Z

(Wrote this while on honeymoon, just got round to uploading it)

The morning of the 26 September started with church bells sounds, coming from the iphone’s alarm. It added a flavour of what was to be expected 5 hours later. Adam couldn’t sleep well with the nerves, so he was up since 7am. I, on the other hand, still exhausted from the continuous weekday shopping and the loading the stuff onto the boat the day before, slept until well after the 3rd snooze.

-Just before leaving home-

Up I was, a bit zombied, but up. We went through another list, which was titled, things to take before leaving the house. Prepared everything and off we went. We had decided to make it more romantic, to change at our respective parents hotel. We had seen each other’s wed suit as we had to coordinate them, but we still wanted to arrive separately in a London black cab. We left the house, took some shy photos of both us in front of the house and we went to the tube. Once in the tube, with all the bags on top of us, and after arriving at the next stop from our house, I asked Adam: ‘Do you have my suit?”

Adam: “I have got mine, why would I have yours?!”
Me: “oh my god, I left it at home!!!”

I shut out the carriage and took the next tube home. This is such a cliché, kept thinking, but too funny at the same time. I looked at the clock, and realised I had to speed things up, so once I arrived home, I called a taxi straight to Victoria, where my family were staying. The traffic was getting worse as we got closer to the centre, and suddenly I spotted some of my family walking to the tube, I whistled at them, they shouted at me where the hell I had been, and then the taxi dropped me off at the hotel. The taxi driver spoke broken English, and had asked me why was I so rushed before.

I am getting married in 1 hour and a half. He congratulated me and my soon to be wife, I corrected him twice, but either he didn’t understand me or was too embarrassed to acknowledge that a homo next to him was about to get civil partnered. I didn’t care, I paid, he shook my hand and I ran inside. I got there, and my mum still in her knickers laying on the bed. I put the iphone’s music on and started getting dressed. Mum started dancing while she moaned about me having white trousers and while she ironed them (still on her knickers). Dad arrived and started taking photos. My parents looked so happy, and that relieved me to be honest. I had been so nervous they wouldn’t like my wed outfit, but it was all great. They looked like kids with new lollipops. *Sigh*.

Told the taxi driver: ‘to Marylebone! You going to a wedding, yes!’, I said, ‘to mine’.

I arrived promptly at 12.15, and soon after my work friends started arriving, one by one, the rest arrived. Adam took longer, but he showed up. He could have taken the next Victoria train to Brighton, but no, he was there with me. It all became so surreal, we were getting married. That’s for straighties, not us! After many prewed photos after, we headed upstairs. The choir that Adam had organised with an excolleague of his, started playing ‘The marriage’ by X. All the guests were waiting inside, we held back until the registrar appeared from the end of the corridor like a movie. The choir just finished as she arrived, and we then went it. We were so emotional, so nervous.

-Polaroid moment, film expired on the 30th September-

I was shy, scared, embarrassed and proud that I would start sobbing while repeating my vows;

"I Ander pledge to share my life openly with Adam promise to cherish and tenderly care for you, to honour and encourage you.

I will respect you as an individual and be true to you through good times and bad. To these things I give my word.

Adam this ring is a token of my abiding love and a sign of the promise I make to you today."

-Signing to be husbands-

Adam’s voice did start shaking, he was getting very emotional, all I could think was, please please let me finish my vows then drop a tear or two, not in between. I was getting more nervous, so when my turn arrived, I was trying to remember what the registrar was saying, and even though at one point I thought I was not going to make it, everything went fine, except…err… I was meant to say …and bad times (as above), but I kinda forgot, the registrar repeated it twice to me! Many guests started laughing. It looked like I struggled to say it, not the case, just being forgetful!

The rings were exchanged, and the choir started again, I looked around, and there were some few gaybos and girls, and mothers, and aunts crying their eyes off! Well, not exactly, but they did need a tissue or two. After everything was done, the choir sang: ‘Good times’ by Queen. Many started laughing, it was a perfect ending to such lawful ceremony.

-The parents of the grooms-

Photos were taken, and I directed the guests to the pub, in York street, The Temperence, which was completely empty when we arrived. It was so sunny that many were outside drinking. The guests made the pub looked full. Perfect I thought. I hardly got time to speak to different groups, and more photos later, I started bossing people around to take the taxis back to the boat.

-School friends celebrating-

After many laughs, mobile calls, facebook status checks, and where is he, or she, we arrived at the boat. We spotted the boat from far away as the guys, Fabien and company, had lifted the pink British flag, it made it look so GAY! Loved it. The guests waited and followed us onto the boat, there Fab and Toni all dressed up as lovely women, handed me the cava flute. We posed more in front of the flag, and off we went down the river.

-Up with the Gay flag-

-Dearest friends for the boat reception-

I’ve been in London since 2003, and I have never seen such views in my stay here, the sun was perfect and the boat full of family, guests, uni friends, random friends, Australian friends, new friends and cousins made it so special. Everyone went straight to the outside bits of the boat and admired the views. The rest was just perfect again, sunny, drunken friends, hilarious speeches by Luke (Adams little bro) and Rachael (work friend), food, chupa chups, more wine, Bollinger bottles for us, etc…. the list kept going.

-The sunset Thames river-

The only stressful bit, was, which was our fault, that we didn’t assign the task of clearing the stuff that belonged to us, and I tell you it was so stressful to end up the boat party like that, clearing dishes with our wedding suits. Adam had to take everything home in his dad’s car, he took forever. I went straight to Heaven, there was no queue to get in, we partied like animals. BUT, Lander and other school friends were not allowed in, as they came late so the queue was massive. Apparently they went back to their hostal to get new shoes for clubbing, as one of our friends from Madrid, had thru a girls shoes overboard onto the Thames river, and she demanded that his shoes went swimming too, so he did!

-Moment where Carlos steals the shoes-

Adam arrived late, but I had asked the bouncer to please let him in, as we had just got married, and he was on his own, they allowed him, and a small group of us, including, John, Nora, Sofia, Gabby, Laura, Rachael, Thomas, and Matthew stayed til very late. Adam and me took a taxi home and arrived at 6am.

Next day, or following hours, I woke up at 10am, with a very fast heart beat, I was so nervous, I couldn’t remember much, everything kept coming back slowly, like slow amnesia. Where are the passports, and the money we were given? And the SLR camera? And what happened to my mum? What shoes? The cupcakes? Why do we have industrial size kitchen sauce pans in the spare bedroom? Did we get married? Oh my god, AM I YOUR HUSBBY NOW?

-Sunset near the Thames Barrier-

It all came back very slowly, but it did, I had only lost my sunglasses. We also have the whole freezer full of wedding leftovers for the next 4 months, anyone for a posthoneymoon dinner party at ours?

-Lick my cupcake?-

-Party!-

I am now writing this on the beach in the middle of the Indian Ocean, Maldives, with the moonlight, the breeze helping my burnt skins parts. This island is tiny and there are only a handful of people around. It so relaxing here, as there is nothing to do apart from swimming, reading, having sex, eating, the odd facebook check, and sleeping. I have been sleeping for the lack of it from these past two weeks. I can’t say it wasn’t stressful, as you know from my countdown, but it was definitely WORTH it.

-The night party version!-

Nite nite from Madoogali, Maldives.

Technorati Tags: Big Gay Wedding gay wedding ander80 homoworld London Thames party civil partnership gay party polaroid last polaroid

Why Homosexuality Should Be Banned

2009-10-18T01:09:00.002+01:00

Technorati Tags: homosexuality gay wedding ander80 homoworld USA gay ban

0: it's here!!!

2009-09-25T23:51:00.001+01:00

I can't tell you how I feel, I always thought all this business of happy sickening weddingness was for others, definitly not others. We woke up today stressed that we had to do more stuff, transport the drinks, linen, cutlery and the rest to the boat, then load it. However, the day couldn't have gone any 'smoother' than it did. First the sun was there all day, shining like a mad fairy heating light, looking down like if it was meant to. Walked along the river bank with my ex-neighbour from Bilbao, she used to bath me, clean me, put some baby cologne and then put me in bed, yes he was my neighbour nanny. Awwww.

Then it hit us! We are getting married. We realised this when we had unloaded all the stuff onto the boat, and the hard work had been done. I haven't stopped txting and messaging in facebook, my assistant. I may throw it over board but then that would be treason ;)

Met my school friends and brought them to a pub nearby, Adam was a bit nervous that we wouldn't fit, then my family arrived, then more old friends, then then... This is the night before the big day and it was amazing to see them all interact (in their own ways, as it's mainly Spanish with Irish chatty folks): it was amazing and I am already set for tomorrow. I have been living in the UK for so long, 11 years, that having so many coming over from so far was very special. I didn't think many would turn up, people think I am a narcissist and that I expect this kind of attention, but I really don't.

It's chilly out there now, which means the sun will come out big and bright like today. See you all tomorrow.

-Smiles-

-- Posted from my iPhone

1

2009-09-25T00:34:00.004+01:00

day left.

I have had the worst exhausting 3 days of probably my life, its a different type of tireness, its a body stress related panic. I think i can breathe now a bit. The boat party sounded great, but the logistics of delivering drinks and food, and materials to this mobile party grooving place its a nightmare. I cant barely open my eyes.

At the same time, I am a freak. I have been checking that people knew what they were and are doing on the day, and having spanish people coming over to London, has added even more stress, I want them here though and I am over the moon.

Parents just arrived in Stanstead, as well as old school friends, other people coming from barcelona, bilbao and madrid. I am so guilty of the environmental impact of this wedding, but like I said I wont have kids myself so its f-i-n-e.

Our small bedroom is packed of alcohol, linen and kitchen stuff. Tomorrow our dearest neighbour Gabby that happens to work next to the pier where the boat will be tomorrow, is coming to load the stuff. We will meet her in the afternoon to load the stuff at the boats office place. Then we will meet the lot, family, school friends, uni friends, and others in Covent Garden for a cheeky drink, before heading home and relaxing for the last night before the big gay day.

The weather forecast is still brilliantly sunny, but it may change. Its chilly, but the skies have that blue autumn crisp look.

I finally tried on the whole wedding suit, I love it.

Im tired, going to bed.

PS: THANK GOD TO FACEBOOK, has made life so much easier to communicate things to guests

Technorati Tags: Big Gay Wedding gay wedding ander80 homoworld London countdown civil partnership civil partnership

3rd

2009-09-23T09:44:00.001+01:00

Lack of thoughts, exhausted, and just realised my family won't understand anything at the actual wedding, trying to get translations now.

5th

2009-09-21T09:55:00.001+01:00

Thrilled, I never thought I would get emotional reading the vows. We were choosing them yesterday. I really hope we don't both start crying! Spent all weekend choosing the playlist, if there is anything that you want us to play tell us now.

"It's going to be a goodnight". Bring your thin jumpers as it will be chilly at night, but looks as the day will be ok, maybe even sunny.

We also dediced where we want to go; Maldives. I don't feel like doing anything hectic, just complete relax, sunbathe and get my PADI certificate for Scuba Diving. All I want to do is read, swim, sleep and eat, and loads of sex ;) shocking.

We will use the money raised from our guests to pay for some of this trip, which I realise now I should have said before.

Tonight going to cut hair in Clapham and then go to Fabiens to go through the day plan. I have got this new app for the iPhone to sort out my lists. Awesome. Which I will be more than happy to leave behind on the beach with Adam.

-- Posted from my iPhone

Androgenyousity Gem

2009-09-18T09:44:00.001+01:00

"Girls can wear jeans and cut their hair short wear shirts and boots 'cause it's OK to be a boy but for a boy to look like a girl is degrading 'cause you think that being a girl is degrading.

But secretly you'd love to know what it's like

wouldn't you

what it feels like for a girl."

Madonna, 2001

Does it hurt living like a homo? It's difficult at times, but it's loadsoffun 2

9th

2009-09-17T21:59:00.002+01:00

Will drop dead with so much weekday shopping. Adam and me had stopped talking to each other after we left Selfridges, cos we couldn't bear it anymore, and were irritated by each other. Still many small things to do before the day, but might as well die before consuming a fifth of the world's resource.

I should be ashamed after taking around 17 flights in total this year (each). But we won't have kids so our carbon footprint will be smaller, even if we adopt that would be like reusing someones else's carbon emissions.

Adam is leaving me behind I better stop typing

-- Posted from my iPhone

11th

2009-09-15T10:05:00.001+01:00

Each day gets worse. I'm really hoping for some blue skies, a tiny bit, as long as we can see some sun and have an Autumn breeze, I will be the happiest
groom.

We were talking yesterday, and realized how Londony this whole thing:

-Suits from Saville Row
-Rings from Covent Garden
-Reception in The River Thames
-... You haven't seen the suit
combination

12th

2009-09-14T09:42:00.000+01:00

Officially next week :S
We need to buy shoes, order linen and plates and stuff... Shut up.

We may be going to Maldives, to lay down and do nothing apart from snorkling and look at little fishes. Our feet gently touching each other without anyone observing us and thinking "oh look, poofs! How hilarious" lets take photos. We had this not long ago, apparently we still cause hysteria amongst some breeders.

I don't care, really, I don't, cos I'm content.

-- Posted from my iPhone

14th

2009-09-12T10:50:00.000+01:00

We are on our way to meet my mother in-law to buy the wedding rings. Today in 2 weeks we will be getting sick in a bag after a shower at home as there will only be 2 hours left.

I was looking at some photos of
me and Adam in the tube when this skater looking young boy gave a postcard. I thought it was something funky or arty. Wrong. th Lord is watching me, at the back of the card says: "God doesn't want you to go to Hell, but that's where you will go if you die without His forgiveness".

Fuck off! You preaching bastards! I'm going to heaven in 2 weeks, 2 hours and 12 minutes.

Lords version of Google map.

-- Posted from my iPhone

17th

2009-09-09T09:52:00.000+01:00

Got something to tell you guys, I am over the moon to marry Adam, look at him, he looks so innocent, sweet and undamaged. Porcelain. I won't deny it, I was in love with him first time he kissed me in that studenty kitchen while my pants were by my knees and our fellow flatmates kept shouting at us to get a room. We did, we found the stairs, the bed, the corridor floor and an overflowing bath.

My first two weeks with him; I was immensely happy, this wore off the 2nd month, but after the 4th it got stronger again. We then moved in together, a big studio flat in the main road of Aberystwyth downtown. We started to see each others role, as much as people think I do nothing and he does everything, i am in charge of various stuff, he cooks and I sit on the table telling him how boring or stressful my day has been. This has not change since 1999.

Many asks us; 'why get married?'
Simple; 'because we can'

Got something to whisper you, I want the party to happen now.

-- Post From My iPhone

18th Day: The Stags resume

2009-09-03T00:27:00.009+01:00

-Wrote this in the plane back from barcelona, but now that i have the photos here is the post-

I need a holiday after this. I’m dead, I want to crawl under a big bed and hide from the world. Adam & I haven’t slept much last night (and the rest) for many reasons. The stag day started with us, Kristoff, Adam and me going to Sitges beach. He kidded about us buying him a flat, so he could take care of it while we lived in London. Sweet memories. We were arriving late so I messaged Fabien saying that we will be late and to see whether the itinerary that they had prepared will be affected. One hour later we arrive at the flat and we were getting ready. I asked Fabien if he had seen my red converses and he took me to the spare bedroom, he glamorously uncovered the sheets of the bed, where he had hidden the BRUNO outfit! Oh my, there was even a wig there too. I was mortified, but Adam seemed more worried than myself. I couldn’t back out of it, so I had to accept the challenge of dressing with yellow hot pants, a sleeveless checked shirts to show my small guns, the yellow braces and finally the wig.

I looked hideous, but funny, ridiculous but party time was arriving so I asked for a big glass of rose and downed 2. Took some iphone photos and off we went to the first stop: Axel Hotel, in the gayest area of Barcelona. We arrived in the roof terrace where our Barcelonian boys where swimming in the small pool. I was so excited of the water that I started to get naked, but Fabien, knowing me well, lent me his blue Speedos. I jumped straight there, minus the wig. Legs up, cava bottles and champagne flutes around the pool. Laughs, photos, and shoutings demanding a Bruno appearance: ‘Me ze Fabuluz! Its mai Stajnight!’. We jumped straight to the Jacuzzi for bubble fun. I felt like a slut, a wannabe rich snob gay, and I loved it.

Adam quietly looking from the corner scared that I would come and hug him with my pool smells. We drank more, dried our bums and headed downstairs for the VIP dinner at that same hotel. Massive mirror, 1 cute hottttt waiter and 2 wine bottles later…. the stripper arrived!

I so didn’t expect it, but I was over the moon to finally have a 1-2-1 session with a hard stomach and hard bum cheeks! I became a tacky stag. The stripper switched from Adam and me, and then he made us hold the thin material to screen the whole nakedness of his pack genitalia sexuale. He put his massive hard on in between my thighs, I nervously giggled, and then it was Adam’s turn. He then covered his manhood and jumped into Toni and Fabien, both shouting: ‘Not me, not me!’ But I know secretly loving the attention of the naked hardon hetero. He was so sweet, as sweet as you can be with a naked penis, but sweet nonetheless.

Adam and me were told to wait in the lounge room of the hotel, but as this was facing the main street with floor to ceiling glass, I had the most attention ever. I was sat in a groovy 70s chair and everyone kept staring at Bruno and his soon-to-be gay husby. I waved and gestured like Bruno, I am pretty sure people thought I was part of the hotel display.

We moved into “Museum’, had drinks more drinks, more photos, more Bruno shouts, more staring. Until I had the discoshits! I was so nervous about the whole night that it had happened, thank God I made it on time, but once finished I realised the flushing system didn’t work in the toilet! I ran quickly out of the toilets and danced more, and more. We tried to get out from possibly the crowdiest anti-fire regulation fire escape bar and out of the club. Paul shouting behind me, my name and pointing, I was hiding my famous face with a fan. Fuk it was hot there. Once out, more people staring. We went inside ‘Metro’, which was a mixed of an audience admiring how shit the dancers of the club were, Spanish music and some spice girls, plus a different room full of pill and cokeheads to the rhythm of “iamgoingtoexplodeyourlungswiththesemusicbeats”. I was very drunk, but at one point, while I hid in a corner, two girls got too close to me: “I like your style, I love how Barcelonian guys dress”, I was mortified to think that people thought I dressed like that normally, so I put my wig back on to make it obvious that Bruno was still there and said: ‘Darling, first I am not from here and also I am meant to be BRUNO!

One by one the guys disappeared, so I used that time to take my shirt and wig off and left my naked torso with my hot pants plus the braces. I ruled, not. The friends that were around left with me at 6am out of the club, but they wanted to carry on partying at an after party, I was so kunted-tired that I took a taxi alone. Imagine the look of people around of the sight of poor drunk Bruno in the dark looking for a taxi.

I got home at 6.30am, and even if I knew I didn’t have the flat keys I thought the guys would hear the bell ringing downstairs, oh I was SO wrong! The portal bell was so loud after 10 distraught minutes with Bruno almost crying thinking that he would have to sleep on a bench near the building. The neighbours complained and closed their blinds. I had a Spanish mobile, but no credit and no Fabien’s number, I found 1 Euro in my hot pants and walked around the area trying to find a telephone box. I had Tonis number, my last resort to avoid the bench looking like a stag-tit. He answered half sleep half dead, and hardly with any voice left asked him to call Fabien to open the door downstairs and to call me. I went back to the flat, but nothing! 7 minutes later two guys were leaving the building for an early flight, when I sneaked in, and reached upstairs. Pressed the bell, and a complete naked Fabien opened the door, saying: oh darling, where you there long? Wasn’t sure whether to kill him or hug him, so I did the latter. He then told me he had been calling my English phone, but I only had my Spanish one on me! I didn’t want to take my iphone with me, in case I lost it.

That night I left my stag night behind, and a boyfriend that arrived home at 10am!

Note: Yes it was a joint stag, but we didn’t want a regular hetero-stag party, so we joined it, Adam made it clear that he wouldn’t dress up or accept a Sauna voucher for the night. I also refused to wear a dress, I however didn’t specify ‘fancy-dress’ and Bruno had to be accepted on the day. The night went on and the next day arrived to our bereavement. We feel like zombies, happy ones.

Thanks to the guys, specially to Toni and Fabien for being fabulous stag organizers. (I can't wait to organize yours)

Technorati Tags: Big Gay Wedding gay wedding ander80 homoworld barcelona countdown civil partnership Bruno gay stag ander

24th

2009-09-02T22:01:00.004+01:00

i want to scream, oh my tities, mother kristh on a camel on 'e', what the fuk! only 24 days left. Just writing up another freaking to do list, do they not end!!!!

panic attack, panic attack!

PS: i wrote a post about the stag night, waiting for photos

Technorati Tags: Big Gay Wedding gay wedding ander80 homoworld London countdown civil partnership panic attack to do list

Off the bitch

2009-08-27T18:39:00.000+01:00

After the beach we paraded ourselves and went to the basque tapas bar; Izarra. Our usual spot after a beachy day in Sitges.

Oh, while swimming I saw a guy releasing his anger to the sea, he kept shouting and having a mini argument with himself, it looked as he was preparing himself for a fight with his wife. Then Fabien saw a half meter fish, screamed and left the waters. He is scared of sharks so anything moving it's a no no.

We are on the train back to Barna, the women fanning and talking like parrots. We are admiring the hot Latino look of the boys. There are so many!

I want to stay in Sitges for the whole summer I don't want to live in London, there, I said it. Fuck the weather, the bad food and expensive life, I am staying and no going back.

Basque pintxos above, so good.

-- Post From My iPhone

Dead in the water

2009-08-27T13:12:00.000+01:00

I have spent 1 hour in the water of Sitges, I laid there like a dead body and my speedos, the sun reflections under water onto my eyes looked like a kaleidoscope. I was in trance, and even more drying out on the sand loungers, I can feel the sun hiting all parts of my body. Heaven.

But now is burning so I might as well go back to the water.

We went out yesterday, first for the strongest mojitos in my entire life, in that first bar when I went to the toilet an old man followed me and threw himself onto me, argggghh! It was like a dog on heat.

We were pretty smashed so took a taxi to Metro, always seem to go here. As soon as I went in, a guy grabbed me and pulled me towards him, I kindly took his hands off my arse and told him bye, while I pointed to Adam.

Tonight we are going to "La Rara" night in "El Pollo", Barcelona trendy style, I am guessing it's like Shoreditch trendyness.

I'm melting and I am loving it.

-- Post From My iPhone

32th

2009-08-26T17:42:00.000+01:00

Aquí estamos, en camino a wonderland despedida de solteros. Here we are on our way to Barcelona for a messy stag do. High on coffee as I should be ...

31 minutes later, now on the plane, all very calm so I won't shit my pants this time with tough winter winds. Apartment booked for four but there is an extra room in case we get guests. I am not worried, but everyone knows I am a control freak, but Toni and Fabien have got everything organised for Saturdays stag night, I am not expecting to wake up with a tiger next to me, and with a complete amnesia status. I mean it may probably be better not to remember, whatever happens in Barcelona, stays in Las Vegas!!!

I gotta a feeling something will happen, and I won't be blogging it, though watch this space in case there is some hot gossip, eg I become a dad or I win the lottery and share my wealth with the middle classes, fuk the poor and the rich.

*I am going to poke the kid's eye with scissors if he doesn't stop playing with the tray behind my chair, then watch him cry*

I wrote a to do list, that's what I feel like I am always doing, house to do list, work list, holiday, wedding, shopping arghhhh I need more spontanity in my life. I wrote a '1 month left for wed todolist' yesterday and it's larger than I thought, it's not like I could cross some over, they are all extremely important. Like the simple flowers on the table or the Viagra pills as a wedding favour for our parents. Lets hope they are still DOING it! ----pause----

*grabs the sick bag*

I don't know why I love having my photos and videos taken, I am so bloody ugly. Botox will look even worse in about 5 years, and I am suposse to save money to pay for my mothers face lifting.

Time to exit, get out of my head.

-- Post From My iPhone

33th

2009-08-24T09:34:00.000+01:00

That means it's almost 1 month!!! Plus 3 days, every little day counts. We travelled for ages in the Picadilly line to get to Osterley station, west London, very clean and suburban, but so boring looking. My soon to be father-in-law met us in a 4x4, and I secretly loved it, he took us to some friends of his, and we went back in the closet for the duration of the wedding food decision.

'Are you married yet?', were asked.
'No, not yet', answered.

There will be plenty of Indian food, 4 starters and 1 main course, with a choice for vegetarians. 10% of the guests are non-meaters, including one of the grooms. Everything will be mild, lets not freak out the Basques and Spaniards. They couldn't get out of the boat if they wanted to!

Awww, look, pretty people in this side of North London, we must be around Stoke Newington yummy mummy baby boom zone and cutie men too

-- Post From My iPhone

Snobby

2009-08-24T09:15:00.000+01:00

I know I am guilty of it, the things before I lived here I never thought I was that much, now I am in complete disgust when walking to the bus stop I see this middle aged couple, they were probably younger, drinking beer at not even 9 in the morning, I am guessing they are alcoholics, I just can't stand living in an area with people like this. I don't want Wysteria Lane either but I don't want to sit next to someone almost every morning while the sip their cheap beer, mmmm beermorning, nothing like smelling like a cheap kunt.

-- Post From My iPhone

Rant

2009-08-21T09:46:00.002+01:00

Unrelates rant about fuckkkking annoying Jehova Witnesses! Sorry if you are one, seriously so sorry if you are or know someone special but I don't fucking appreciate you knocking my fuckking door on almost every saturday, I get all excited it's a parcel until all these intrusive bastards start talking about living in heaven, fuckking great for you, I am gay and I like my arse heaven now fuck right off.

Not only that, on my way to work, near Seven Shitters, seven sisters for you guys, I also get stopped, awwww someone nice talking to me, oh NoT!!! Again, salvation?!!!!! Do I look like I need it?!!!! Fuck off. I am all for respecting religions, but leave me live on my own peace. An fuck off wherever you came from.

I will start a new religion, knock on every door, even if they were not convince first time round, tryin to find guys with sexual problems and then converting them into 'gaysm'.

Just leave me alone, go to the desert and preach to camels.
.
Best of all, don't touch me

-- Post From My iPhone

37th

2009-08-20T21:36:00.000+01:00

Not sure wether people are looking at me or staring at me cos either:
-Deans hair cut or
-My Lauren shirt or
-Eye

It's hard to tell but I have noticed more boys looking, it could be the summer horn, they are gorgeous. Left my charity event after work from building site which will be the Olympics soon and met my sister near Bond Street. Went to Favourbrook in 55 Jermyn Street and asked for my beloved suit to the very cute English young blond timid boy. Grrrr... Even my sister and I commented how sexy is when they go all flushed up. Maybe I was attracted to him cos he seemed like a rich boy. Shallow, I know. Nora asked him whether I should wear a bow tie or a tie, and he answered definitely tie. Sweet again.

Tried it on, sister commented how preppy I looked and we left, not without waving shy-ly to the shop assistant. Walked around, jumped and screamed when a taxi wanted to run over us, and had a pizza in Carnaby Street. Nora told me about some things that I better keep quiet for the time being, as family wouldn't be too pleased. Boys stuff. Walked to Soho and yes we ended up in GAY bar to celebrate this fine Thursday that was today. We talked about dirty porn photo messages and looked at some tight bums in jeans. Told Adam I had tried the suit in the bar and that even guys clapped when I did the walk. He called me straightaway panicking that I did, what does he think I am?!!!

No trust, he probably thinks I am a crazy cow.

-- Post From My iPhone

38th

2009-08-19T10:01:00.000+01:00

We bought my suit yesterday. We went to Jermyn Street, close to New Bond Street. Walked passed the 3 shop and saw the jacket I wanted, it's ... but I really liked it! Wasn't too sure about buying so quick so we walked up and down the street but we went back to try the whole outfit. It goes well with the London and river theme, that's all I am allow to say. I know for sure that my basque family side will find it strange, then again it's my wed not theirs!

The shop assistant took the alterations measurements. Adam and Fabien were there with a huge smile, they loved it. I took it to the sunshine and it really glows (not like a neon light but more the colours and the general feel to it). Though I did think of having a proper 2nd outfit for the night out too, maybe we can get it in Barna next week.

No coffee rush today, but yes to stinking pee from drunken chavs in Seven Shitters tube station :S

Apartment for stag booked, after a 10 minute chat with the bank MasterCard pin from India last night to verify my pin.

Oh, I found my 1st white hair in 2 years, see location of it below, shocking! It's the organising stress. Off to work now to get my 2nd White hair, hardly.

I'm smiling like Gordon Brown

-- Post From My iPhone

39th

2009-08-18T09:58:00.000+01:00

Confusion, miscommunication. Today I had planned to take half day off to go to a tailor shop by Christian Dior but Adam has too much to do at work and meetings. Dior is s lie, I wish. I stayed at Fabiens last night looking at flats to rent for the stag do, which is much more fun than boring suits. I went to his cos my hairdresser is in Clapham, south of the river. He left too long of a tupe so now I look like a 2009 version of James Dean with a funny eye.

Summer still here and we had a nice Battersea sunset over the balcony. We catched up about all last weeks events, not many, well none funny or unperverted enough to expose here.

I woke up early and took the bus to Victoria, bought a memory card for todays compost bin photo shoot, the joys of the waste industry, grabbed a fucking strong espresso and a minging fake farmed salmon and light cheese from Sainsburys. Now all nerved up in the Victoria Line, which reminds me of Barry White. When I lived in Clapham, our first flat in London, I used to commute to Greenpeaces office and listen to Barry. Now the Victoria is totally Jazz.

Oh, I fingered some wax product in Sainsbuys cos this fringe is coming down, no more Mr Dean guy.

PS; Jesus titis, when will the coffee ease!!?!
PS2: Just jumped into another train, never possible without the caffeine, I always worry to look like a missingtrain kindaguy

-- Post From My iPhone

Day 40th

2009-08-17T09:34:00.002+01:00

Countdown has started, it's feeling real, was talking about a work colleague being X amount of weeks pregnant by our wed date and I semifinally freaked out; there are only 6 weeks left!

What do I do? Just put these glasses on pretend it will get sorted alone. Fine, Adam said by the end of this week we will;
-decide or buy rings
-have a proper idea of suits
-know the intinerary of the honeymoon in Morocco

Sounds reasonable, as this weekend the inlaws are coming for a London conference about eating disorders, all very wholesome one thinks.

Who has faith that we will deliver the best boat party in the Thames this year? Answers in an envelope, along with the wedding present ;) Out dearest wife, Sofia, is kindly desiging the intinerary cards, we dont want guests to get lost from the ceremony to the pubs to the boat. I shall email these to the lucky people.

-- Post From My iPhone

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Day 45th

2009-08-12T10:08:00.000+01:00

Big sister, not fat by older sis, came from Spain with an envelope full of Euros, mumy had given her cash for me to buy my wedding suit, awwww she is now coming to the idea that I am getting married to this hot and sexy older guy called Pablo, just kidding, sexy Londoner with Irish and Kashmir genes Mr Butt. However, Nora also brought this huge tomato grown in my home village Abadiño. My uncle made her bring two as he was impressed by my first ever crop of green beans, though it's my 2nd year tryin to get a decet variety of organic grown vegetables from a London back garden. Here is the perverted tomatoe:

What you can't see is the width or the monster veg, it weigths 1 kg, and puts my cherry tomatoes into shame. Then again the sun comes out as often as the Queen visits Tottenham.

To Adam: 'You are so hot, I melted', Jason Mraz, "I'm yours!"

-- Post From My iPhone

Day 56 thousand

2009-08-07T20:25:00.000+01:00

I lost count and I no longer know. Out with the boys, that makes me sound a but pervy, u refrase it. Toni and other people we know are in town, so we are heading to Soho for some action, again some dancing and perhaps some innocent flirting.

We still need to buy the wedding suit and the ring. That's the major two that wr haven't done, thoug we havrnt paid physically for almost everything else. Puke, but I went to Regent Park last Sunday with Finn to check for post wed suitable places photo shoot area. I looked good eith my nice new pink topman shirt anf sunglasses on, I had Finn with me, which make me feel like I lived in the area and therefore like I disregard everyone else there cos they are more rich than the tourist. Fine I Said, in normal. However as I was crossing the road into Great Portland Street a cyclist shouted at me: "fucking idiot!", I know he said it to me cos there was no one else in the pavement or in the road. I smiled even more and carried on; I finally was rich.

I am inside the tube, in Holborn. Adam hates to talk in the public transport via he thinks everyone else is listening to our superficial unimportant conversations. We have just arrived and Adam has just said the second word to me while here.

Happy Friday everyone.

-- Post From My iPhone

60th...

2009-07-28T09:44:00.001+01:00

Morning skipping to work, thinking of the week off after the BGD, Adam and me will be honeymooning, and I never thought we would be allowed only 10 years ago. After all many believe we deserve less rights than our friends the breeders.

Looking ahead. I know is competely tacky, but I envisage a week of doing fuck all, ride horses, drink champagne watching the sunsets and perhaps torture some ants for the sake of it. Morocco, Turkey, north Italy, a lake in a rural Swiss chateau or even volcano climbing in the Canary Islands, which is meant to collapse one day and destroy the Eastern side of The USA Of America ;)

Last Saturday our power went off, it's the 3rd time in a year, someone said that's is very normal in a poor multicultural area like ours. But I really enjoyed it, Adam came to realize that there wasn't tv, so he had to watch the London orange carbon dioxide filled twilight, which is most amazing. We listened to Ave Maria by Betthoven in the iPhone and hugged, we kissed and the light came back, but I turned it off quickly.

That was for me a taster of what I expect, plus the ants.

-- Post From My iPhone

Day 65th before BGW

2009-07-24T10:00:00.002+01:00

Today 23rd of July, Adam and me had a taster of the desserts to be served, there will be cupcakes from Crumbs & Doilies. We tried 2 of them and so far the vanilla is the winner. We have 2 more to choose.

I left work to have a veneer put on my front tooth, which has been annoying me since I was a kid, after my mother gave me awful coagh medicine that stained my tooth at the age of "very young". Once done I thanked the crazy Indian dentist, explained the nurses why I was having it done, and being women they went "awww that so sweet that you are getting married on your 10th anniversary", 3 awww later I used my MasterCard and left to meet Adam in Covent garden.

We met in the middle of crazeee full of tourists Covent Garden and walked down to Old Compton St where they do one of the best coffees in England, Pauls. The hot chocolate in winter reminds me of the Spanish version. Took the espressos away and tasted the cupcakes outside Prowler, while we observed the cuties passed by. Carried down to Regent St inside Hugo Boss and was not impressed, suits suits suits. Didn't see anything that stood out. My wedding clothes were not there, I also want the shopping experience where the groom try on different suits with their friends or best men, though it sounds like Pretty Woman, minus rentboyz.

Walked to Selfridges and adored the way the clothes are on show, but the tags showed £2k suit jackets. Pass.

Went to John Lewis and the bright neon fluorescent white light made for a very chavie experience. So I left moody. Adam kept saying "I want colourful ties for work", and I replied "I want money".

It's hard being so disgustingly middle class, I can't afford unconventional suits like YSL or Armani (although this is borderline Hounslow rude Asian boy).

I went home with my new sweet tooth and 2 smudged up cupcakes.

-- Post From My iPhone

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Swiny bloody Wed

2009-07-22T09:54:00.000+01:00

I must admit I am slightly worried that our civil partnership or gay wedding will take place in the year of the economic meltdown AND swine pandemic, specially in London. Gee, will all my guests be safe coming over to the city, specialty when they are recommending pregnant people not to travel in autumn?!

Jesus poo

-- Post From My iPhone

Confusion Girl by frankmusik

2009-07-20T15:28:00.004+01:00

Confuse me, Confuse me. The singer is very cute, I came across this song when I typed for gigs in Heaven as we are thinking that we may end up there after the wedding. But I played "Confusion Girl" by frankmusik

He so cute! and CGirl song is keeping entertained at home, as I'm homeworking cos i cut my foot on saturday after a gay sharp glass went through my converse trainers and then through my virgin right foot flesh. To play the song go here

Check his MySpace page

Video: i want to kiss him

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Sofia Lace' contribution

2009-07-15T09:34:00.004+01:00

Our dearest friend Sofia Lace has contributed to our BGW by designing the invitation in kind; www.sofialace.com a 21st digital designer, as she does more than websites, she also cooks tastily and healthly. We had several samples to choose from, and even if Adam really liked a yellow version of this one, we went for the traditional look. We have had all sort of feedback;

My mum: "don't understand it, where are your names, ! I kant anderstand it !
Work friends: "it has a V&A style to it, I like it!"
My Miamian aunty: " The invitation card is unique, very pretty. I like the way you joint the names. Who was the designer?"

So here it is, it was printed A3, twice the size of a normal piece of paper, the back was printed with a nice pink, we have some samples left if anyone wants one.

Technorati Tags: Big Gay Wedding gay wedding ander80 homoworld Sofia Lace London boat party V&A gay invitation civil partnership

-- Post From My iPhone

Post weekend

2009-07-13T10:16:00.001+01:00

Monday is here and have finally had a good drunken crazy ish weekend. Friday finished with a sad taste; Ianto was killed by the 456 in Torchwood and Saturday started with Pimms at Mr Guys pad. Heaven was good, and again Mr Guy"Surprised" with shots of sambuka, memory vanished and we were naughty. Met new people and we slept little.

I am not freaking out, Im palpitating as the day gets closer, we are so lazy we are leaving it to the last minute, yawn yawn. Like my sister is saying, I can't stop talking about the BGD, that sounds like an STD, but it's the Big Gay Day.

I am feeling happier, I am coming into terms that I am not 25 anymore as I was when I started the blog, and sometimes I feel broody. But that's a complicated affair between surrogates, eggs, mixed sperms and or adoptiog agencies. Not all at the same time. We have thought of adopting little brother and sisters so that fhey are together, Jesus titties Christ, will mean spending less on holidays and future correction facial surgery.

I am on a runt, Saturday early evening, we were in the picadilly line towards battersea, these teen girls sat next to us and apparently Adam overheard one girl saying; "look! Is Bruno!". Seems Fbook guys think the same as I started to receive msgs that hey have thought that before.

Ander & Bruno. Fukme I am not that Austrian!!!

-- Post From My iPhone

Rude tube

2009-07-12T17:13:00.000+01:00

In the tUbe back home, I am getting married and the stress is buildin ip. I never thought I would end up doing s big party. But here homo I am!

The Big Gay Boat Party will take place on the 26 at 5pm at unknown place near big ban, ben dear, ben.

I am shocked, my family is coming, my uni friends, London mates all our swinger friends.... Just kidding ;) I didn't know we would end up having 100 people coming. It seems the boat is a bigger attraction than the vowel exchange ceremony. Yes, I don't know the difference, I don't know how to spell that.

I have never been hacked into my email before, but I have just checked my gmail sent folder and someone or something has sent 21 email to a craiglist I have no idea of and call me Kelly. I am goingto have to check my bank account to see if I have been screwed there too. Is this an iPhone hacking problem?!?

Location; Finsbury Park, time; 23:02. I am working tomorrow. Listening to Roisin Murphy. Mood; Sad & stress. View in front of me: half chav 17 year old reading the Evening Standard. Front page: Bright banked plunged into death. Thinking: do I look like a twat typing this inside the tube at landscape mode?. Next mood: Need to organise food catering for the boat.

He is cute

-- Post From My iPhone

Hyde park summer day

2009-06-27T20:54:00.000+01:00

Mr Whippy had a sticky brown day, and we talked about Nora's troubled
days. Secret, oh yes Adam and me tying the knot thud September
>
>

Home time -Etxe momentuak

2009-06-11T16:30:00.005+01:00

A lot of time has passed since the last post, 2 months, so yes many things have passed, bad and good. We were burgled last month, beginning of May. Some scum cunts forced themselves into our house from the back garden bedroom door, the broke the hinge of the french doors and came in. They stole many silly things, like a bag of condoms, my house spanish keys, all our watches, my ipod, camera and 1 week laptop. This laptop was a replacement to the one that Adam had left behind in a taxi in Sydney, so lucky us we buy another one, which we are paying in monthly instalments for 3 years.

Fine, the insurance company has accepted our claim, and will be getting us these things back, thankgod, cos we dont have any more money to replace, and we do pay a lot monthly for this bloody insurance.

There are news in terms of our 10th year anniversary of Adam and me together... watch out this space. I am in spain now, so I am off to the shops let mum buy me more Ralph Lauren shirts. I saw this suit for a September date, I tried it on...oh mama, i loved it, Valentino, YSL, DG...why am i so pijogay (snobbygay)

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No clubbing

2009-04-12T02:47:00.003+01:00

My eyes are hurting from squinting at the screen, it could be cos I am wearing the contacts lenses for more than 12 hours or cos I haven't cleaned them properly in a week. Arghhh I am bored, its Easter and we haven't been out clubbing. I spent the past two hours looking at online fliers which is further teasing me. Currently no friends to go out this mini break which is fine, really, is fine, really. Not.

It has been about 2 weeks since we came back from ozland. Things seemed back to normal, ups and downs, but we just need to keep going out during the weekend in order to feel ok here! as the weather is shockingly boring. At least by dancing topless against all those bodies in a club, no that I do that of course, makes me feel alive. Last weekend, we went out but had managed to sneak in some whiskey to save money (the holidays has left us bankrupt). I ended up very drunk and thank god for my sis who helped me take a taxi home from East London, Ghetto. It was fun until it lasted, maybe the 3 sambukas didn't help. I didn't get sick, I just closed my eyes whilst dancing, maybe it was the jetlag...sure. Nora and I arrived home and 30 minutes later Adam came in rushing into the house and said shockingly:

"You never guess what conversation I had with the taxi driver!"
"All the way home he was asking me whether I had picked up girls or had danced with many, then he moved onto whether I was horny and he just asked me if I wanted to give him a blowjob so the ride would be free! this is after he pointed his sat-nav at his crotch and had asked me where we were heading (insinuating at his cock).

Not did Adam refused completely shocked, but he then agreed to pay him an extra tenna cos the driver was annoyed he didnt do it! I think the boy was scared he knew where he lived in case he reported him.

Note, this is the 2nd time he has had this experience, once when he was 16 in Richmond!

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Bak

2009-03-27T07:54:00.007Z

We arrived from Ozland last Sunday. We lost my mobile, my cap, the laptop, a rugsack, and probably some money. As I lost my mobile, I couldn't blog anymore, sorry for keeping you in the dark, but most of you read me in Facebook.

We had FUN, amazing time. We were in Sydney, Cape Tribulation, Cairns, Melbourne, Great Ocean Road trip and a winery visit. Three weeks went quickly, but managed to do a lot.

Now I am trying to recover from this trip, first the depression. why back to London? is cold, grey and people in the tube are all dressed in black and dont talk (me included). Also shop attendants are so much nicer over there, here they seem to be doing you a favour when you buy an item. I am literally more chatty over there, here I am reserved, quiet and shy. Most of you wont agree, but I dont care.

Highlights of the holiday,

Scuba diving with nemo in the coral reef
jungle surfing 25 meters above the floor
Wine tasting even though the crop was ruined from the bushfires
dancing with the gaybos in Sydney Mardi Gras and Melbourne.
we did however get "insulted", they called us "fags", "faggots" and "poofters"; I was surprised but not scared.
the views from the flat in Sydney overlooking the city
got caught swimming naked in the spa at 5.30am by security guards
losing the laptop in a taxi
swimming in bondi beach, and having to get out cos of shark alerts
meeting up with friends that once lived in London
making new friends
karaoke in Hong Kong gay bars; awful

I will put up the best picts.

HOWEVER, 5 days after arriving still suffering from jetlag, keep waking up very early in the morning, 4am. I took the dog for a walk, and now blogging at 8am with a cup of coffee.

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Dinner

2009-03-04T11:15:00.001Z

Loads of noodles and side dishes for 8 quid. We all want to fall sleep, cant wait to see a movie on board, shame about the valium

Relaxing

2009-03-04T11:06:00.001Z

We slept almost all day today. We, as you know, went out last night with no much success. Still we ended up at the Hotel late, and woke up this morning only for breakfast, then we went to the doctors cos Adam could feel his throat infected, and from past experience, where he ended in hospital, he decided to visit a Chinese Doctor. Amazing, they saw us in 5 minutes and he got the antibiotics, only $400HK, or £40.

The staff around the city are so attentive, always opening doors and helping you in general without us asking.

The place we went out yesterday was like a western owned area, with all white blonde girls and men with suits, it was awkward, I didnt like it as it feel like we were in a London or Canary Wharf. JUST ARRIVED TO AIRPORT BYEEE

Ole ole ole

2009-03-03T19:09:00.001Z

Finally we found a gay place but it took 4 times to go passed it and 1 brave attempt to go in. Then we were followed by a very horny western finance working officer. . . I stopped typing cos 2 straighties came over and said whether we wanted to hang out with them, indeed we need of friends but we told them unless they wanted to leather guys they could cum. just kidding, there are no leather clubs here ;)

We are on our way to the hotel. Frankly we bored of this city, there is no gay bars. Plenty of culture, which frankly I am interested for 1 day, not 2 in a row. Fabien and Adam are sleep, but hugging me, cos we are in the back seat of the taxi, and they think that by holding me (Im in the middle seat) I wont fly out in case of an accident. Fab is now snoring, Adams head is falling on top of me and Toni, passenger seat, is sighing, maybe cos we as closer to hotel. We love travelling, but if we cant flirt or dance, we become andropeusic gay men.

All our throats hurt, we bored of chinese meat and the clubs too early, one more reason to fly out this country as quickly as possible, SYDNEY HERE WE CUM!

Pollution

2009-03-03T06:26:00.001Z

In fish market

Good Morning China!

2009-03-03T02:12:00.009Z

Toni, The Dreamgirl

T3, Heathrow London! the holidays start

Looking like tourists

The hotel viewIchy contact lenses reason

Restaurant with snails and cleaned dishesEnjoying ChineseHomo Karaoke

Woke up disorientated and with a bit of throat pain. My contact lenses were itchy last night, I think its the pollution. There are so many more lights than I expected, but in general seems like a quiet city, they don't seem to shout in the streets. Right, so after walking like total zombies trying to find a gay bar, after prior internet searching for "gay bars in Hong Kong" in Google we marked three in Tsin Tsui (not sure the spelling). We ended up in a 'restaurant' outdoors with live snails trying to get out of the plate, yeah we didn't orders those even though Adam said: "You have to try them, you have to at least before we leave tomorrow!

I said, 'maybe'. Fabien and Toni in the meantime were too busy trying to figure if the guy behind me with nice hair was guy, after 32 minutes, they agreed he was, and kept whispering: 'lovely, lovely'

We paid and went around the block to buy chewing gum, but ended up in an alleyway where the restaurant's dishes were being washed, shame I didn't have my SLR camera, and I am still surprised I don't have the shits. We carried on walking and found the 1st bar, Wally Matt Lounge, distinctively chinese-homo. The music, ... well its a mix of Spanish pop and English pop sang in Chinese. Its not great, Fab and Toni changed the jukebox music into, Dreamgirls song. Left the place thinking the 2nd bar will be better; Tony's Bar: it was worse. Even though the clientele was younger, the music was an ear-bleeder, specially as it was karaoke night. I am sounding very westernised, but after Toni and Fabien couldn't pay with their Chinese money (apparently you need Hong Kong Dollars) we left the bar. We ran to find the 3rd bar, but we failed and left in a taxi back to hotel.

We all woke up for breakfast, looked at the cloudy sky, and now they are all having a post breakfast nap!

Good Morning China!

Pinch me with those!

2009-03-02T14:49:00.001Z

Finally managed to leave the hotel, walked around and saw loads of lights. But we are walking like zombies with the jetlag. We mapped 3 gay bars and here we are searching for them. But we stopped at this place with an awful white light. Just received food

Just landed

2009-03-02T11:59:00.001Z

Long journey in a 1cm square space is not my ideal place to sleep, I watched 3 movies and only couldnt find the valium in the dark, typical. The cabin crew also managed to miss me for dinner or give me wrong drinks 4 out of 5 times. Couldnt even knock myself down with a sweet whiskey and coke.

The weather is very humid and cloudier than London. taxiiiiii!!!

Driving test

2009-02-14T13:31:00.001Z

Yesterday, 10th of February, I passed my driving test, at the 6th try. After loads of thousands of pounds and morning flexi days. I was really getting frustated about the amount of money spent, and it still feel no close to passing. I am not a bad driver, I just dont pay attention to other driver or pedestrians you see.

Fine, I passed so watch out for the gay cross eyed basque guy around North London roads.

Just finished celebrating it with Trudy in highbury and Islington, not quite drunk but enough to think that a third of the guys next to me look sexy. Got Australia trip and autumn wedding to organise now, more money to spend, plus getting a car for our massive food shopping trips.

Listening to Poker Face from Lady GaGa, loveeeee it, while I wait for the Victoria Line to arrive as I left the 1st go cos it looked like a cramped fish tin, screaming I want to go home but I am uncomfortable touching this mans arse!

Thats all from me, see you soon blogging in Ozland or Hong Kong .

just MayBe, If i BehaVe

Ghetto

2009-01-24T01:04:00.001Z

Here we are. Waiting for Alaska to come out from the song queue. But nothin. We are getting . . . at the end of september. So bloody obvious

Obama

2009-01-20T22:09:00.006Z

oh yeah, besides my haircut, Obama became president today. I was in the gym, and missed the speech. I'll read it now online. Will he mention freedom? rights? Progress towards equal rights for gays? He should know about discrimination, lets see if he manages to change and get some real progress.

"70% of African Americans backed Prop. 8, exit poll finds" or put simply "70% of California's black voters backed gay marriage ban"

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Loving

2009-01-20T09:55:00.003Z

Its Tuesday today. Spent the night at Fabien's after cutting my hair. It takes more than an hour to get there from work, but I still like my hairdresser, a Jehovah Witness. I am bloody weak with hairdressers, I go with an idea for my cut and get convinced by them, I give up easily.

You can have an undercut, he says nodding. The instant reaction is to say YES!

Half way through I am panicking that I will get a 90s bowl shaped cut. I breath out when he does the finishing touches, like stylishing it and cutting more fluffy hair. Fine I say to myself, is not what I wanted but its good, trust them, they are the professionals. Although they wont be wearing the cut we are their lab rats.

I remember our trip to NY three years ago, there was loads of sex going on, not us, but the friends that we went with back then. Butchering gay sex. Is not as bad as it sounds. Well, it may be for you breeders. That was a good trip.

I love NY and I love Sex. Do I love sex in NY? SI! Yes!

PS: Adam and me should a write a book of our stories, when everyone we know or care are dead.

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Im Yours

2009-01-18T17:00:00.004Z

by Jason Mraz its a nice song that makes me smile on a Sunday evening and feel like a gay singing and skipping from the corridor to the kitchen and back.

Jason Mraz - I'm Yours
Uploaded by jasonmrazworld

We had a nice night yesterday. Met up with wife Sofia, and old school friend Inge. We went back to Ghetto and met up with Matthew, a guy we keep bumping into in the same club. Then we made friends with two northern boys. Sweet. I am in a good mood, even though the hungovers are getting a bit risky, as they can trigger small panic attacks, which I dislike dearly. The trick is not having coffee.

I didn't do new years resolution, instead I proposed some changes. One of them is the gym, I am sick of going home and sit in the sofa for 6 hours, I already sit on my third eye all day at work. Besides I want to look a bit leaner before our holiday to Australia in March. Almost everything is booked apart from the 4 days in Cairns. I cant wait to toast myself under the big ozone layer hole with cream factor 50, even though I look damn sexy with a tan.

I realized I never did a photo essay for 2008. Mainly cos I would like to forget that year, I had too many up & downs.

There is great news coming for this year, watch out this space, you may be invited...

Valete to all.

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Queens Wood

2009-01-17T15:00:00.003Z

Walking the dog and I saw this when I looked up. They look like arteries. We in Queens Woods forest in Muswell Hill.

New version:

Slipping through my fingers

2009-01-05T12:33:00.003Z

xmas is gone, thank feck for that. My liver, my brain and my mental stability was at risk, it almost slipped through my fingers. Dont get me wrong, I had probably the most fun xmas ever. The problem is going back to work today the 5th of January, 2009.

Jesus, someone in this tube carriage stinks of BO. NYE was crazy or so I think for what I remember. We got to Popstarz on time, sometimes I wish I could freeze the picture. We met Dawn Porter in the cloakroom and easy Fabien told her that she looked much better in real, old trick, but she really did looked thin though. We then of course danced tacky-ly to Grease before midnight. I sneaked in a 100ml of whiskey in my pants, after all everything is bloody expensive that night. A sense of guilt I cant deny. We were too wasted, or I was, cos from 2am onwards I don't remember it, I wasn't too bad, as I was told, but at 5am while I taking my coat to face the subzero weather, I noticed I made a top swap. I remember being totally gosh-smacked as I had a random red primark tshirt and instead I had lost my H&M waistcoat. Bob next day told me I had been dancing with a red-topped guy with NHS glasses.

We took the dreaded night bus home. We sat at the front, halfway through our journey it stopped for 20 minutes, a black guy asked the driver nicely what happened, and he responded aggressively: "I don't like the tone of your voice, keep it to yourself", I was shocked, so I started speaking to the guy and both agreed I should ask to see how he reacted. The driver told me: "I don't know, we could be here for 2 hours, the police have cordoned off the whole Camden Road", black guy and I also agreed he was a tiny bit racist. But I asked the driver whether I could ask the police outside for more info. He let me out and policewoman told me she couldn't tell me but it could be hours. I went back to the night bus and told off driver for not announcing it through speakers. I then started shouting so that the whole bus knew that they had to leave unless they wanted to sleep there. We took an overcharged taxi and arrived safely home. next day I had no hungover. The news next day said that an old lady had been killed in Camden town area.

But we did decide on the 1st of January that we will get married in Las Vegas in May this year! But it was mainly my idea so Adam told me off and the idea is now abandoned. We will however do our stag night, Jesus! we have been saying that we will get married for about 8 years, and we have proposed to each other about 4 times: top of Eiffel Tower, Empire State, Ghetto dance floor and the other escapes me.

I am just coming from the hospital, appointment with the consultant, he has now discharged me and says me shoulder will look 10% mobility, currently I have 20% loss, but it doesn't bother me.

There are some lyrics in this post from Mamma Mia song titled same as this post.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009

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Leaving

2008-12-30T18:16:00.001Z

We are at the airport. Going back home, and even though I didnt achieve to buy a manbag I did see Dublin today with the inlaws. We had a nice lunch and a Guiness at 'Cafe En Seine' very cup deco style. There is not interesting dirty funny stories to tell, as I only slept and ate during there Holidays.

Now waiting in the departure gate for plane, fat man in front of me is eating a big greasy panini and cleaning his chubby fingers on his own jeans. Oh MY GOD, he has his wallet hanging from his neck and his eyes are way to inside his face. If you are fat at least dont act like one, eat in silence and use a tissue.

Rant over.

There are so many gays in the airport, all flying away from small cities

Irish Christmas

2008-12-25T15:40:00.004Z

I will slick my hair to one side, wear black thick glasses and buy a xmas jumper. I love the outfit. We arrived into Ireland on 23 December at 22.00. It was a mild plane flight, we did have some turbulences and since that near death experience from the flight back from Madrid, I am petrified of them. The plane in November was basically shaking both sides and dropping few meters in the air. I thought I would have been more braved but no, i was staring at the front seat table like a mortal. I was dead inside.

Fine, the plane back here was ok. Ryanair is like flying in a night bus from London with wings. Im not posh or a snob, its just the colours offend me eyes and some people on board. Funny though was the comment from the Polish cabin crew: "Please be seated until the seatbelt sign is off, if not you will be shotdown!" everyone looked at each other to see if anyone else reacted and to realise that it was actually true what he said. Loved it, made me smile. But the turbulunces started again, and then I almost poo-ed myself, thank god Adam was buying overpriced vinegar, I mean white wine, I grabbed it off from him and downed half a glass to ease my nerves. My hands just sweated like the amazon in high tide.

We arrived home after picking up Adams nephew from the same airport we landed, Dublin. We got to "Butts End" and slept. Nothing much has happened, so I better go before Adam shoots me down for being anti-social while I write this during Xmas day.

I am going to eat cheese sticks.

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Faggoty Attention

2008-12-19T16:25:00.002Z

Fanni

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Message for me?

2008-12-18T10:07:00.001Z

Random arrives as fast as it goes. I am feeling the xmas blues and its the first year in my life that I could skip the holidays.

I have got a message but I cant read it yet. I have gone blank

Smelling Summer

2008-12-05T18:53:00.003Z

I can smell summer even though we are in the middle of winter. I had 3 pints already and its only 6.32pm on Friday. Ok, yes, I may have had some drinks after the meeting, but the main question is what the heck I am doing typing this in a tube carriage.

Forget all I said about this year, I am feeling myself now: happy, content, complete and happy.

I am now typing this in a escalator, saddo. Now in a pile of alive people pushing me cos they are worth more than their monthly incomes, and right now in the middle of the carriage heading to Finsbury park just to annoy the fuckers.

Back to the issue, I can smell summer through my ipod, yes ipod, not iphone, I hate the sister. Roisin Murphy is singing and can honestly feel the sun of summer touching my pale mediterranean complex. Sun, I miss you. I miss your summer foolness, your careless attitude. I want it back and I cant have it back until March, where I will be going to the blue shark infested beaches of Australia. I really do care about carbon and I would trade my emissions with the poorer anytime. I was kidding, gosh you all take it so seriously, I will trade it with the lower income class, that's I all meant.

I am in Manor House, I will do the guy in front of me . . . If I was single. Getting gay married next year to celebrate a decade of unapproved sexual intercourse my Mr God.

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Self Portrait

2008-12-02T21:28:00.004Z

The longer I live the more I realized how much one can analyze himself to death. I am 28 and even though I don't reckon I know myself completely well, I do think I am very close. 2008 has changed me and what I see in the mirror. Instead of the silly funny-eyed boy who grew up in a very loving and happy family, I see a little man who has achieved some of his many targets. I also see some deterioration, I see selfishness, careless attitude and too much of an opened personality.

Last month inspired by some portraits of Mr Warhol I took my SLR and asked Adam to shoot me. What do I see in these?

First, narcissism brought in from being the youngest of three.
Second, presence of confidence , which I lack in the right place/time.
last, optimism, no matter how shit things look, it will all be fine

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Fabien

2008-11-29T21:56:00.002Z

With Fabien, he is a bit white wined. We yes sadly meant to go to Heaven, but were told by staff in this bar that Britney wasnt going to make it. Maybe just a PR. Though I doubt she will come. After all she is probably got better things to do like looking after kids that she doesnt have anymore. Gosh, I am really not bitter, i just dont care, i want to dance with whoever. Maybe if I saw myself in the mirror, then that would be fun. Kidding, well not, yes, maybe.

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Familiar Weird

2008-11-21T22:40:00.002Z

The weird thing just happened to me. I have been living in the UK for 10 years and today I was at work checking my emails and I received a Facebook notification saying that this girl had just added me. I didnt recognise her name so I carried on working.

Then work colleages and me went out to Shoreditch, which we Never Do! 2 hours later Rachael my colleage said to go downstairs where the dancefloor is. So we did. We realized it was very empty so we looked around and decided to go upstairs to get the othes, while i was headi upstairs a girl grabbed my arm and said: Ander? I am like, yes? Remember me I am oihane from your school.
After 10 minutes I realised who she was, last time I had ever talked to her was in 1998, while I was studying for my High School finals in my city, Bilbao.

I really couldnt believe that I met this school old friend 10 years later just hours after she had added me in Facebook. Come on thats freaky. but nice. I will meet her for a coffee and talk about old times

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Madrid

2008-11-10T18:38:00.002Z

<
I would live there tomorrow, I was surprised by my change of taste. I thought Barcelona would be better but somehow I changed my mind. I used to come there when I lived in Bilbao, to visit my aunts and 2nd cousins.

I went to Madrid to test the gay clubs and to visit a school friend that I have only seen by chance three times over a decade: growing is tough, wish there was a handbook about it. I miss being myself without having the rude tag attached as soon as I open my mouth. I have changed a bit in order to fit in this country, or maybe I think I have but the reality is that maybe I am happier with a bit of sun in November and good food without being ripped off by rude waiters.

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Sun

2008-10-16T09:45:00.001+01:00

I am absorbing the last rays of sun before I get into a building in Aldgate East for the whole day. Hair and beard is going soon

Fog goes with the sun

2008-10-14T21:31:00.008+01:00

Clissold Park, London (12 Oct'08)

Autumn has arrived, so has fog and mist; sadness is a thing of the past. Now that we have booked our tickets to Hong Kong, Sydney and Melbourne things are looking up. Though, there are many things I would also like to change, not something I would expose here, as it will have some life consequences. Everything has consequences.

My birthday went surprisingly well. I almost had a mini-panic attack before leaving the house to go to Soho, what is wrong with me? why am I so nervous suddenly. Met the girlz and the boyz in an Italian restaurant that I had chosen a week before. Not without its prior-bickering between Adam and me, as a Libra it takes me forever to chose anything, and when I mean everything I mean all things in life. In fact, I seat myself writing the pros and cons and 2 hours will fly, I am a freak. A lovely freak I would say. Adam and me bickered for about 10 minutes in front of Fabien, who as a close friend is now very use to it. He will probably give us an ultimatum for the trip to Australia next year.

It has been a while since I sat and blogged. Adam is not here, he left yesterday to do some training and is back tomorrow. Finally ALONE at home!!! my loneliness is my paradise. I have been lets say, a bit off life lately. First I am told I need braces, so I cancel our wedding for next September 2009 (no way I am with braces for my wedding day), then I had surgery, then I am told the recovery is very slow and that they are concerned I've developed a frozen shoulder. Then I get mugged near home. Worst of all, which I didn't write it here I was petrified when I was assaulted also on my way home. The short story is this:

I left East London after a work leaving do
I take the night bus home, but because I was SO tired from the night before, I felt sleep
I woke up a station after mine, Bruce Grove.
I felt very scare as soon as I got off the bus. It looked like a open prison
It was 3am
I decide to take a shortcut
Three black guys with hoodies started following me
I tried to check if they were, and one of them sweared at me and kicked me so hard in the neck that his shoe went flying.
I felt to the floor on my tummy
I felt terrified, I thought I was going to be stabbed
Out of nowhere my adrenaline kicked in and started running like in a movie
They stopped follow me
I was a bit traumatised and I'm always very wary now if I see dodgy people

2 weeks later, on a normal night out, Adam and me were literally opening the door to our house after a night out in Soho, when a sport car reversed and the guys started abusing us verbally "Batty boy! batty boy!" Adam was so angry that he replied: "all you want is to suck my cock!" that didn't go well, and they opened the doors like if they wanted to come out, but the car just left.

Yes, all of this was reported to the police. But now I feel unbalanced. I went to an aggression awareness training for work and was told counseling doesn't work, and I can see already that I am better with time. The attack happened beginning of September. I posted this as soon as I came home from the kicking in the head. I needed to expose myself. I thought it may me feel better. Next day I felt humiliated, fragile, weak and angry for the scumbags that are ready to rob or hurt people because life isn't as Bling Bling as they would like, cunts. (sorry)

I am going back to my Finn, who I hugged while I cried to my sleep that night.

Home (14 Oct'08)

Technorati Tags: attack bruce grove ander80 homoworld fog adrenaline bling+bling London night attack

Life

2008-09-27T23:15:00.001+01:00

Is making me insane. There. Here I am. I was allowed back into Ghetto, I was barred 6 months ago but I think this look totally made feel different. Somehow I feel like blowing Christ.

A sunday morning

2008-09-21T11:09:00.001+01:00

In london Bridge. Finn and me woke up early so that I can show her central london, she is 4 and never seen it. We now lying down in the grass by City Hall. Its so SUNNY! Right, I am taking her along the South Bank and then I will show her Soho! my Bitch in Gay old compton Street, she better mark her territory and pee all over, then I can say it belongs to my Bitch. Bye

Sterile

2008-09-17T11:45:00.001+01:00

Hackney, Hackney, dont we all love it

God wants me

2008-09-15T09:34:00.001+01:00

Nowhere around him. Well I have had a shitty 2008. I need to update on the previous post, I was attacked on my way home 3 weeks ago, and I was simply petrified. I am still paranoid. Homophobia, there is plenty in my area, bunch of retard uneducated ignorant coward cunts.

A man behind me told a Jehovan witness book preacher as I was coming into Seven Sisters station this morning: "Your God is a fraud"

"so is yours" I told myself

terrified

2008-08-30T03:35:00.001+01:00

I AM TERRIFIED 03.35AM SATURDAY MORNING
NECK HURTS

Back in Sweet Cold home

2008-08-28T17:55:00.001+01:00

It maybe a bit bold but yesterday after my first day at work I collected my first ever tomato crop from my little garden. I dont know whether is worth the money yet, as I have spent quite a lot of time taking care of my tomatoes which only now have matured.

Yesterday was my first day at work, oh god it was a hard day, I couldnt keep my eyes opened and I hardly said a word. Today instead I was more recharged and felt like the holidays helped me get here, my state of mind. Oh! Yes, I cooked for Adam, well I was taught by him how to do risoto, but it tasted delicious.

Now reaching my station, seven sisters, how to get home without getting stopped by a thug as I look megagay with my new gaymanbag.

Airporting

2008-08-26T16:40:00.001+01:00

We are wining down some good brilliant sexy red tasty wine and a jamon bocadillo. We have been going through a 'list', and we are now waiting for number 23 and number 16, please come to the reception desk for more information.

We are now drunk. Again.

Oh I made a decision, I am doing some chances, so I bought a Lacoste bag.

Shit! We meant to be boarding and we not even in the gate! Byeeeee

Ending

2008-08-26T16:32:00.001+01:00

This is Fabien as we finished our last night in Bcn. Loved it even if the sun didnt come out as often I wanted. Wanted to get fried but it didnt happen.

Last night, we went to four different places, and one thing that it stayed in my mind was: people are too intimidated by us, cos we gorgeous. Not sure if thats true, by the have definetly been looking at pointing at us.

Sigh

Souls

2008-08-26T00:49:00.001+01:00

Two lost souls in Barcelona: Fabien and I. Not wanting to go back and talking about issues

Alone

2008-08-24T15:18:00.001+01:00

Came alone as the guys didnt think the weather will get better. Oh, boy! It did get much better, though i forgot to bring the swimming trunks! So i am with my white small Calvin Kleins. I could fall sleep, actually I will. Bye

Faggots

2008-08-23T23:25:00.001+01:00

The new fashion is causing a bit of stir. 4 of us were just called Faggots. Poor insecure breeders, will it be acceptable to call a group of black guys, niggers? No, so why is it ok to be homophobic?

Now having dinner, with loads of sausage

Missing you

2008-08-23T00:30:00.001+01:00